What’s humility you probably asked? A very simple but very important thing in marriage. Whether you agree with me or not every marriage should recognize an entity that the entire family must connect to. And in most cases the man serves as that entity in the family besides God Almighty.

Humility is the quality of not being too proud about yourself. As a matter of fact, a lot of marriages are going through conflicts because no one recognizes anybody as the head of the home. I want you to know that no two persons can be head at the same time. The modern world is of the view that we shouldn’t talk about anybody being the head of the home; but rather both the man and the woman are all heads. I bet to defy because when we go back to the basic about the institution of marriage, there’s a head.

Every institution just like marriage institution needs a head. The head is very important because the head may not have all that it takes to manage the marriage but plays a significant role in its sustenance. The recognition given to the head makes all players in the institution to rally towards a central point. In the Scriptures we’ve been made aware that the head of the church is Christ and the head of the home is the man. Do we need to turn the scripture upside down because of modernity?

Why are we having so much uproar in marriages today, it’s probably because we allow the teachings of the world to run our sacred home (the marriage home). A very important scripture worth mentioning is found in Colossians 2:8 (NKJV) “Beware lest anyone cheat you thorough philosophy and empty deceit, according to the basic principles of the world, and not according to Christ.” Can you deduce something from the texts? When we run the home according to what the many gender activists are saying, you would ruin your marriage or have no peace in the marriage. Remember, most of these gender activists are not in marriage and see things from the theoretical point of view rather than the marital point of view and what prevails in marriage.



My advance dictionary assigned 9 meanings to respect but I selected the one that would make my view clearer on the subject under discussion. Respect is an attitude of regarding something or someone as important so that you are careful not to harm them, treat them rudely etc.

Do you regard your husband as important stake holder in the marriage? Do you exhibit humility towards him by the way you interact with him? Your conduct, behavior and attitude will tell him whether you regard him as important or see him as any other household member.

Because of the heavy responsibilities the household head carry as a family man, he deserves to be treated as such. Men can’t be important than women, but for the sake of family cohesion and happiness, respect your husband. I respect my wife and expect her to give that recognition to me as the head of the household. I don’t think respect is too much a think to ask from women in marriage.

Let’s walk in our marriage with respect for each other. Husbands should equally respect their wives without subjecting them to emotional, psychological and physical abuses. See your partner as important decision maker in the marriage and work closely with her for the mutual growth of the marriage.


A bad and abusive husband is as bad as a woman who doesn’t show humility for the husband. Your kids are watching how you are relating to each other.

If you demonstrate arrogance by speaking to your husband, their father anyhow, they would grow up to exhibit negative behavior towards women. Why? Because they see you their mother as being rude towards their dad. I guess you don’t want that to happen to your sons! Do you?

Whatever you do with your husband will tell your kids how much importance you placed on your spouse. If your treat him with the maximum care and respect, your kids will follow suit to do same to their father and the marriage would be the greatest beneficiaries.


 If you humble yourself before him, he would all things being equal reciprocate this gesture by loving you more to demonstrate that he appreciates your “good attitude” towards him. No man would be happy to love a woman who doesn’t show humility but demonstrates pride and exhibit high sense of importance than the husband.

A counselor once said ‘if you can’t be humble in the marriage as a wife, don’t get into marriage because the marriage would be too hot for you to stay” No wonder many high class women can’t because they see humility to be too expensive.

Marriage is not a lecture hall for you to prove how intelligent you are with your facts and figures. Most of the everyday issues you face in marriage would need common sense approach to deal with them. If both of you want to prove how intelligence and how important you are, the marriage would lose its relevance.

It’s not an error when the book of Ephesians says “wives submit to your own husbands as to the Lord for the husband is the head of the home as Christ is the head of the church and He is the savior of the body (Ephesians 3:22).

This scripture verse has been manipulated to favor men but its careful analysis from hermetic point of view shows God’s orderliness in marriage. This is God’s divine arrangement for   the family so that harmony can prevail. It doesn’t indicate one gender to be    more important than the other as most people were made to believe.

The scripture is not a political   football to be played around to suit our personal interest. We either accept it as God’s divine word and benefit from it or reject it and deal with our own challenges in our marriages.


No man will hurt and disrespect a partner that is humble and respect him. Every man wants the exhibition of humility from his spouse to show his recognition as the head of the home. This is just an “empty title” but spiritual in nature. It’s the responsibility of the man to intercede daily on behalf of the family through prayers. This is non-negotiable! Besides the man ought to provide for the family upkeep. This is also a must do.

As a matter of fact, my wife has difficulty submitting at times because she felt she could do a lot of things without me. I told her she had it all wrong. Marriage is not about showing how independent you can be but building a relationship with your partner in    marriage.

Many gender activists can’t marry  or would find it difficult to do so because they feel too important to submit to the opposite gender.

This post is not to stir any controversies about gender equality but to state the record straight and discuss one of the issues that matter to men in marriage. After all our prime purpose of creating this blog is to promote healthy marriage relationship for successful family life.


 Have you checked the relationship between you and your partner lately? Is everything alright? Do you know your gentle humility towards him can make him to change his attitude toward you? Yes, he will appreciate the fact that you have given him that special recognition in the marriage.

Men can be down to earth if they know they have women who regard them as family heads in the marriage home. Don’t argue with him even if you disagree with him. Find an alternative way to discuss your issue without making it looks like he’s a loser or good for nothing. No man will be prepared for that.

If you play your part very well your husband would tell you things he might keep to himself because of your negative attitude towards him. It’s not too late to change and demonstrate humility in your marriage.

Hopefully, we’ve been able to identify 5 reasons why men demand humility in marriage relationship. We all hope and pray to have a beautiful marriage relationship with our partners.Everybody should play his part well while the Divine God bless and heal our marriages. Join me to keep praying for marriages all over the world, because the marriage institution is under serious attack and threaten by all kinds of philosophies of the “modern world”.

Enjoy your mid-week but watch out for my Friday special post on the title “There should be no competition in marriage” I want to hear your comment and your view about the topic under discussion.

Stay blessed!




  1. Haven’t you noticed that the feminist movement is winning its war against men?
    I’d say that communication and mutual respect is far more important both to the success of a marriage and the raising of children. I’d say that this should be the message to pass on to children.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. The feminist movement is great but it has its problem. Respect should be reciprocal but humility in marriage should not be under played with. The movement appears to be self-seeking in most cases. Marriage shouldn’t be like a fight between the sexes. Each person has a unique role to play. Thanks and let keep the discussions open


    2. Mary, you noticed that we don’t go into relationship to fight for equality but to love each other and build a successful relationship. Love, mutual respect, sacrifice, patience, humility, truthful ness, commitment, determination, faithfulness and many others are important in the marriage union. Equality is not the main driver of relationship success. If l buy a car for my wife l would do that out of love not based on equality equation. I wrote about men’s involvement in domestic chores to assist their partners. So the gender movement can’t win in all situations and l don’t think we are to depend on them for building our relationship. Have a nice weekend and greetings to your family


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