BE YOUR KIDS FRIEND AND A RESPONSIBLE DAD
In most cultures across the world the man is being regarded as the head of the family. So it is in many religions worldwide where special protocols are given to the men because of their place in society. The respect given to men also comes with special responsibilities that men must fulfill in order to keep their highly esteemed position before society. Below are the 10 socially constructed responsibilities the man must play as a matter of obligation.
- CHIEF PROVIDER FOR THE FAMILY
The provision of shelter and basic necessities (food, clothing, medical care, education, entertainment and leisure is the core responsibilities of the man. The above mentioned roles were the responsibilities placed on the first man, Adam during the time of creation and still remain the core role of the husband. These responsibilities are not to be relegated to your wife.
Times are hard as alleged by many men across the globe due to rising cost of living. But in the midst of these challenges, you can’t shred your responsibility as the head of the household. Society expects you to this important any compromises. If your spouse can assist you as is happening in most modern home, be thankful. A lot of women are giving helping hand to take care of the home. Remember she is giving you a helping hand and not to take over the running of the home while you are still alive
2. PROTECT THE WIFE AND CHILDREN
As a responsible husband you are to do everything possible to ensure the safety of your wife and children. This means making sure there are emergency fund to take care of contingencies and emergencies without leaving your family to charity and philanthropic organizations to take ca re of them. Sometimes these charity organizations may not come quickly to your aid to avert the situation, that’s why you need to set aside your own family emergency fund.
Don’t leave your life anyhow and hope and pray that nature would take care of everything in your family. Things don’t just happen, unless you cause it to be so.
3. DEMONSTRATE UNCONDITIONAL LOVE TOWARDS THE WIFE
Yes, unconditional love without any string attached as the condition for showing love to your spouse. Men are admonished to Love their wives, says the Bible (Ephesians 5:25)
Your wife is not mandated to love you but to respect you.
If you fail to show her love and live with her in love without comparing her to other women, then she can live longer and peacefully with you. If you measure the love you must exhibit towards her with a ‘marking scheme’, you will always fail her and she will fall short of your acceptable mark of her. You are not perfect neither is your wife: But she is still leaving with you in the midst of your abundant weaknesses? Learn to deal with her as a unique individual and remove the fault finding spectacles from your eyes.
4. GOOD DISCIPLINARIAN OF THE KIDS
Do you know your wife respectfully expect you to instill discipline into the kids? Sure, she wants you to do so while she compliments your efforts. Don’t look up to your wife to instill discipline in the kids. If you fail to perform this crucial role, your kids will not “connect” with you as their father and you will have yourself to blame in the future. Your kids expect you to discipline them if they go wrong. Correct them with love.
I heard a young man who could not read the late father’s tribute because according to him the father was not always available for them. Simply put, he didn’t know what to say about the late father. Your wife has her limitation when it comes to discipline and you must not fail your kids.
5. YOU MUST LEAD THE FAMILY TO KNOW GOD
God gave your kids to you so that you can raise them appropriately for them to know the true God. Don’t allow your kids to discover their own God and form their own opinion about who God is. It is your responsibility to teach them about God. There are so many false teachings about the existence or otherwise of God.
I don’t know what you believe but I believe in the existence and the presence of God and teach my children to know and read about him through the scriptures.
6. COMFORT THE WIFE IN TIMES OF DISTRESS
Even though I am not a woman I can sometimes empathize with women because I was brought up in a single home when my dad and mum separated. She did what she could to raise the six of us.
You wife may be going through so many emotional problem without telling you most of the things she may be going through. That’s why you need to be observant about her mood swing and address urgently whatever she might be going through. Don’t assume anything for her without engaging to know her real concern. You might probably be the cause of her problem, who knows. Don’t sweep her worries and concern under the carpet without taking action to address them. If a particular behavior of yours is making her unhappy and disturb, please desist from it. If she is happy, she would create the needed environment for you to be productive and happy.
7. SUPPORT THE WIFE IN DOMESTIC CHORES EVEN IF THERE’S A MAID
I wrote quite extensively about this domestic stuff and express reasons why the modern man must support his wife.
Read about modern men do house chores
As a matter of fact, domestic chores are becoming evolving and can’t be placed under the shoulder of the woman alone. You must offer to assist her in doing some of these activities to free her from the pressures that come from doing these household chores. I share my domestic chores with my wife and do much of the chores without being told to do so because I see it as part of my responsibilities. A woman told the husband “the kitchen belongs to both us and you should also do what women do in the kitchen”. Don’t wait to be told what to do.
# Dad Get Involve in Domestic Chores.
8. FULFILL YOUR CONJUGAL OBLIGATION TO THE WIFE
Some men are failing to fulfill this divine responsibility to their wives, leaving them to satisfy their libido with other objects, rather than receiving the ‘warmth’ of their husbands. A woman told a sad story in court as a grand for seeking divorce because the husband has not have sex with her for six years for no a parent reasons even though they stay under one roof and sleep on the same bed.
You marry her to fulfill all obligations including sexual fulfillment. You are not to give any excuse why you can’t satisfy this condition unless you are medically handicapped to do so. Don’t deliberately leave your wife behind and go and satisfy your libido with other women. She is your wife and she deserves whatever satisfaction you derive as a man. Using the cover of tiredness and work to maltreat her sexually is not acceptable and you should desist from it. I sometimes receive letters from some women who complained that their husbands stop having sex with them a few months after their wedding or marriage. # Stop starving your wife sexually.
9. BE A FRIEND TO THEIR KIDS
Fathers are missing from most home, even though they come and go but the kids can’t feel the presence of their fathers. Your kids need you to find out their fears and worries and how they can overcome them. You have a responsibility to interact with them and find out what is bothering them and how you can assist help. Kids are being bombarded with video games, FaceBook, Instagram etc. Who check how the kids use these wonderful tools? That’s why you need to be their best pal so as to assist them to know how to use these important tools properly.
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6 Shameful Behaviours You Must Not Exhibit Before Your Kids
If you therefore make your kids your best pals, they would be free to approach you for anything that is bothering their minds.
# Dad be available for your kids
10. PAY OCCASIONAL VISIT TO THE IN-LAW
In some part of the world, the success of the marriage is judged by the number of times you visit your in-laws with gifts and money. Since culture and people’s believe differ from place to place, it can’t be said to apply in all jurisdictions across the world.
However, it is fitting and proper to show gratitude and appreciation to the parent of your lovely wife. Pay occasional visit to them in the company of your wife and children. They would be delighted to see you and their daughter with their grandchildren if there are kids. This issue is very important to your in laws and they want you to periodically visit them but can’t tell you.
#Visit your in-laws regular
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